Now I am quietly waiting for the catastrophe of my personality to seem beautiful again.

— Frank O’Hara

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Anonymous: Hello lovely! Have you gotten your exam results back yet? I'm sure you did splendidly :) Much love x

Hey :) Yes, I got them back today. Thank you and much love to you too x


Anonymous: With which weight would I be hospitalised? I read somewhere that it is below 16.5 but I was wondering whether you know an exact BMI?

I am not in a position to give you any medical advice on this so you would have to discuss it with a doctor. However, as far as I am aware, reasons for hospitalisation are not necessarily only based on a specific BMI but also on your general medical condition, as symptoms and complications can be of varying severity for each person at a different weight.


Anonymous: Happy birthday lovely! I hope you have a wonderful, happy and healthy year and that we'll be seeing much more of your smile <3

Thank you very much for this lovely message <3 


"My brother killed himself
on the twenty-eighth Thursday of last year
and I missed four days of work
and my mom wanted to know ‘Why’.
My brother
he was always a fan of beauty
but what he did
was not beautiful at all.

And last week I got the news
that one of my good friends from high school
had overdosed
(again)
except this time
she’d gone too far
and now she was gone.
And I had a hard time falling asleep at night
and her mother
hugged me tight
and thanked me for coming to the service
but I did not
want to be there at all.
This is not
beautiful.

The girl down the street
would’ve turned 21 last year
and I can scarcely imagine
the wild times she would’ve
(should’ve)
had.
But she is buried six feet deep
after falling nearly 300
and she did not leave a note.
This is not
beautiful.

My freshman year of college
and my roommate was beautiful
and how I wanted to be just like her.
But she wore herself down
till she was
almost invisible
and if you blinked
you had to go and find her all over again.
So now her parents are no longer supporting her college tuition
but are paying her hospital bills
watching their daughter crumble.
This is not
beautiful.

So y’all can take your narcissistic
romanticizing
and glamorizing
of self harm and eating disorders and committing suicide
and shove them as far up your ass
as you possibly can.
Starvation is not beautiful.
Killing yourself is not beautiful.
Sadness
is not beautiful.
This note I am writing
is not beautiful.

But you
you are beautiful
and it’s about damn time you start believing it.

"
—(via runiqu)

(via encryptions)


Anonymous: I hope this question doesn't offend you but do you think you will ever recover? I wish you lots of happiness and that you can but I'm not judging. x

I don’t perceive your question as being offensive. I’m not sure. At this moment in time I cannot imagine recovering completely although I hope I will one day. Thank you, it means a lot x


Anonymous: Merry Christmas! Have a great festive season and enjoy yourself as much as possible! <3

Merry Christmas to you too! Thank you, you too <3


Anonymous: How are you doing? Honestly though, I'm genuinenly concerned and wish you to be happy.

I feel very uncomfortable talking about this to be honest. I don’t want to complain or bother anyone. I think you can tell from previous questions that the answer would be not too well but I am trying and hoping. Thank you, I appreciate that very much. All the best x


Anonymous: What happened to your girlfriend?

She passed away over a year ago.



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